It hurts a lot to love someone only to realize that they do not feel the same about you. There are many, many people out there who experience this sort of rejection on a daily basis. Indeed, it really hurts, especially considering all the imaginations you might have fantasized about and other things, all for you to be rejected. This term can be called unrequited love.
Unrequited Love
This term basically means to have strong emotional feelings for someone who does not reciprocate the same feeling towards us. When such things happen, the standard explanation we normally give ourselves is that we are not perfect, which is why, or that we probably are not up to a certain standard, which is why our crush does not return that feeling. But actually, there is more to what you might have initially thought. There are a lot of things that can contribute to this situation:
For instance, it could be personal reasons. There is no way anyone would want to reject the sincere love of another without any tangible reasons. Of course, physical attraction plays a key role, but that is not all. It might be that the said person has their own personal reasons and sees it as an unfitting time to indulge in love.
It could be that they just got out of a hurtful relationship or that they are just having certain issues at home or at work; it could be anything at all. However, if that is not the case and it rather has everything to do with you, such as your personality, appearance, or anything of that kind, you might want to read this article; it was made with you in mind.
Also, there are times when people find themselves in relationships and suddenly, their partner turns ice cold. Their partner does not reciprocate the love and effort they put into the relationship. If you are also going through this heartache, you also need to read this article. If you are ready to fall out of love with that unlucky soul, let’s dive right into it.
13 Ways To Fall Out Of Love With Someone Who Doesn’t Love You Back
- Accept The Truth
This is when you have told them what you feel for them. When you finally get to know that they do not share the love you have, the only thing you can do in that instance is to accept it. Make sure not to go around begging to have them come into your life.
Accept that they do not need you and are probably pursuing someone like you. Make sure to find peace within yourself, nurse your aching heart, and move on to the next step.
- Reflect On Yourself
In the case where you realize that your crush does not return the love you have for them, you must endeavor to know the reason why they do not love you like you do. You need to access yourself and ask yourself questions if there is anything at all you do not do right. And if you realize that there is, then you find a way to deal with whatever situation that is. If not, you can choose to ask them personally.
- Ask For A Reason
If they cannot return the love you have for them, you need to keep in mind that there is probably something they have seen about you that puts them off. You need to ask them “why.” You deserve to know why he is not interested in you like you are. If you do not, you might later find yourself in a similar position. Or even there might be someone who even likes it, but due to that particular thing, they have chosen not to express their interest.
So, it is very important to know the reason why you got rejected, because when you do, you are able to work on yourself to become at least better.
- Acknowledge How You Feel
After knowing whatever reason there is, you need to acknowledge how you feel. No doubt it will hurt and all, but you need to accept that it is what it is; there is nothing you can do to make them love you back. After all, it’s not like you can force someone to love you. So the best thing to do is to acknowledge your feelings. You process them, accept them, and then move on to the next step.
- Express Your Feelings To Yourself
In your alone time, you must find the means to relieve yourself of the emotional storm that might be welling inside of you. Also, when you get the time to yourself, make sure to not do anything that can hurt you or anything. Most of the time, especially for adolescents and adults alike, they end up hurting themselves with sharp objects, all because some unlucky person did not just realize how lucky they were about to be.
So, in view of this, express your feelings to yourself, but make sure to not do anything that will hurt you physically. Also, you can even opt for a healthier way of easing yourself by listening to music, enjoying sports, or basically doing anything you love.
- Understand That It Might Be A Blessing in Disguise
In order to move on from a person who does not love you as you do, you need to understand that it might be a blessing in disguise. You will never know the end result of a relationship. It might be that you were putting yourself into a toxic relationship; who knows? You honestly might never know. Therefore, this step requires that you acknowledge that rejection as a possible blessing in disguise.
- Find The Means To Stay Away
To quit loving the one who does not love you back, it is possible to try and stay back. Why so? You see, the thing is, after the rejection, you see them continuously, almost every day, and trying to pretend as if nothing happened will be quite weird. and in order to get away from this feeling of weirdness, you might learn to stay away from them for something.
In the end, it will actually be for the best. As there will be inner pain to be felt, the wound will feel like it is being opened up again. So, for very obvious reasons, even when you have not told them you like them, for the sake of your mental health, you must try to stay clear of them and then move on to the next step.
- Guard Your Thoughts Away From Them
It is a good practice, especially given the fact that they do not share your feelings and do not entertain any thoughts about them. You must be conscious of your thoughts at all times so that you are able to steer clear of your thoughts to avoid any painful memories from drifting back in.
It will be best for you to focus your thoughts on your hobbies, as suggested earlier. Make time for yourself; make yourself so busy that you will have no time to give them thought.
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- Focus On Developing Yourself
One very effective way to stop loving someone who does not love you back is to focus on yourself. This point can be taken in any way you want. It can be prioritizing self-care, such as working out, skincare routines, and taking care of your physical, emotional, and mental health. Also, you can develop yourself when you decide to work on your career, where you will eventually become the best version of yourself.
Once you make such strides in that direction, you give yourself the chance to become a better you, such that, in time to come, they will marvel when seeing you.
You will be surprised to know that that time from now will be when they will be interested in hooking up with you again, but I promise you that, by then, you will have improved your game, provided you really were able to get polite with them, which I suggest you should.
- Invest In Healthy Relationships
Another way to quit loving someone who does not love you is to prioritize healthy relationships. Invest in them, your time and energy, or anything else you can offer. Once you have good friends, things like these will not bother you.
Good friends are indeed people to treasure. Once you are with them, rest assured that you will instantly forget your worries, including a typical one of this kind. If you have very few friends, take this challenge upon yourself. In a day, make sure to talk to not less than 10 people, get to know them, take their contacts, and link up with them sometime later, once you get the chance.
- Plan Your Future
There is a lot of solace in making plans for the future, especially in situations where there really is hope; indeed, there is solace to be found. When you plan and think of your future, thinking of places to go, the money to be got, the cars, and suitable life partners to meet, you get to find an unprecedented amount of solace, and it is indeed very beautiful.
- See It As A Chance To Learn
Also, in trying to quit loving a person who does not reciprocate your good intentions, see it in a different way than rejection. See it as an avenue to gain experience, where you learn a lot of things to enrich your knowledge on issues of such matter. Once you are able to see it this way, you will always be one step ahead in case you are ever met with a similar situation, or even to administer help to someone who finds themselves in a similar situation.
- Seek Help From A Professional
After trying everything you can, if it seems not to be working, you need to seek help from people who have specialized in the field, such as a therapist or perhaps a counselor. They are all qualified enough to help you. Therefore, once you realize that you are still hung up on this person, even when they obviously do not care about how you feel for them, make sure to make a move as soon as possible; if not, you might continuously put yourself under unnecessary stress, which can be avoided only if you are down for it.
Why You Should Not Hold Onto Them
Loving someone who does not love you can be a roller coaster of emotions. And it is advisable to let go as soon as possible, even though it hurts. The following are some of the reasons why you must let go once a person does not reciprocate your love:
- You will be drained mentally and emotionally.
It is important to keep in mind that keeping hold of someone who no longer loves you will leave you tired and drained in the end. You will always be in a constant state of different emotional changes, such that you will not even know your standing with the said person. And as such, you will keep hoping, only to realize at some point that they actually do not have you in mind.
- There is someone else meant for you
Actually, as you are busy hoping for the one you love to look you in the eye and reciprocate your love for them, your actual person would be somewhere else waiting for you. As you spend time with this person you feel like you really love, your actual person might be passing you by. Therefore, you must not let the attention of the one you are so infatuated with blind you.
Give yourself time and open your eyes. There’s someone aching for you and longing for you. This person will not treat you badly but will rather cherish you because they love you like you might not be able to imagine.
- Love can’t be forced
It is a hard truth, yet I believe you must hear it. There is no way in this world where you can force a person to love you against their will unless you are a supervillain, which is highly unlikely. So, you must understand this fact and give the person a break. If not, you might end up hurting not only you but also the said person.
- There will be only pain and disappointment
Also, finally, another reason why you must not hold on to someone who does not love you back is that you might end up disappointed and hurt, especially when you see them with someone else, so the best thing for you to do even before it gets there is to accept the fact, despite the hurt, brave through that emotional storm, and let them go.