Regardless of how long this relationship might have lasted, at times letting go can prove to be a very hard thing to do, especially taking into consideration all the hopes, promises, and wonderful feelings you probably have for him. Sometimes, it could be that you had no idea he was married, and as such, the realization can be quite shocking and heartbreaking.
However, it is a good choice to finally decide to let go. Dating a married man, for most young ladies sometimes can be a very attractive adventure. Not only that, married men naturally, due to their experience, have some irresistible charm that they mostly use to entice these girls; however, one thing you must know is that they belong to someone.
He is somebody’s man, and as you might have already thought, when it comes to anything, you would definitely be the last on his list in whatever situation. A married, cheating man is not someone you would want to trust when he tells you that you are his ride or die.
Even aside from that, when you are found out, which is quite probable, you will not only have a great problem for yourself but also for the other family.
So after deciding to let go, it is good to consider having some time for yourself to go through some healing processes to be able to let go completely and be back to your normal self.
Concerning how long it will take to heal, most of the time it greatly depends on how long you both have been together and how much affection you had for him.
Since you cannot immediately let go of that affection, this article will provide you with some ways to help you get over your love for a married man. If you are ready, let’s dive in.
How To Finally Let Go
The following are some strategic ways to help you let go: As you read, keep in mind that letting go might not be very easy; however, for your sake, you must try your best.
Accept The New Change
Sometimes, change can be quite a scary experience. It is normal. However, it is a requirement for humans to be ready for any kind of change that might arise along the way. All you can do is embrace it with open arms.
Naturally, you will hurt, no doubt about it. But it is a good choice to make. Accepting the change will help you focus on other important things that will actually take you somewhere.
It will help you to get into new things, such as exploring the new time you have for yourself. In that case, you can even use that time to learn a skill, perhaps, or even focus on your career.
In accepting the change, you need to acknowledge the fact that you also have your own life. There are people out there who deserve you and who can show you love like none other.
Once you decide to accept this change of life, not knowing where you stand in the life of a married man, you start to realize that you actually have a lot of things that you can have going for yourself.
And before you can see this ray of sunshine, you must finally accept that change, that you are not going to be the “mistress” of a married man any longer.
Accept Your Emotions
When you decide to let go, there will be a surge of emotions, especially when you actually have real feelings for him.
And that is the one thing that can make it hard for you to let go. But for your own sake, you need to disregard it and move on.
I am not saying it will not hurt; trust me, if you really do love this man, it will be a battle of your mind against your heart for your own safety, and it won’t be easy. But in cases like these, you must consider your safety, disregard your heart this once, and use your head.
Let the emotions flow. If you cannot hold it in, go into your room and let it all out; after all, it is a step closer to healing that you must make sure to take. After that, acknowledge your new standing and move on.
Set Boundaries
It is never too late to set boundaries. Especially when your emotional and mental well-being is at stake. The best thing for you to do is come up with ways to limit your encounters with him.
Such as telling him outright or unfollowing him on social media. When he realizes this new demeanor of yours, naturally he will be concerned, but this article urges you to be much more concerned about your emotional and mental well-being.
Make sure to not let him back into your head. Some married men can be very alluring with this husky voice of theirs, but be sure to limit their chances of getting into your head, physically, online, or anywhere at all. It will not be easy, but strengthen your resolve and do what will benefit you.
Seek Professional Help
Another thing you should consider is that once you have made up your mind to let go, you need to seek help from relationship experts. They might be the very few people, apart from online articles, who can actually understand your situation better and provide you with the required help you need.
A counselor or therapist is a good choice; see them, talk to them, and see how helpful these people will be.
Remember Your Values
Every woman has values. It is what makes you as elegant as a queen. But sometimes, due to many reasons and the wrong lifestyle choices, many end up disregarding these values and doing whatever will make them okay or get them what they want.
One thing most women would rather die than do is share their man with another woman. But due to some ignorant reasons, some women do not care; they throw away the values that make them real women, and in the end, they become less of the person that they had every right to be.
The only way for you to regain that value and that level of sanity is to go back and pick up those values. Actually, you might think that it is too late. Well, you need to understand that it is never too late to do the right thing. Once given the chance to right your wrongs, you must disregard everything and jump right at it.
Revisiting those values helps you realize that, as a woman who is supposed to be pure for that one guy you might meet someday, you are better than stooping low to share somebody’s husband. It will help you to actually break all ties with the married man and be true to yourself.
Find New Interests
Since it will not be very easy to let go, one thing you should definitely consider is looking for new interests that will take your mind off the pain you might be going through or perhaps reduce how much you might be missing him.
You can opt to go for a music class or a dance class; it could be just anything you might be interested in. Keep in mind that as you focus on this new interest, you not only get your peace of mind, but you also, in the end, get to do something you actually love to do. Who knows? In the end, there can be other benefits you might actually get from it.
Even finding a new interest, serves as a chance for you to meet new people who might potentially turn out to be your person. So, give this point a thought, go out there, have fun, and let go of that man.
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Give Yourself Time
You should know that, when it comes to how to effectively let go of the man, you will have to give yourself some time.
Emotions are not like a switch you just turn off. No, it’s far from that. Consider the time it takes to like a person, or even to love them, the things you might end up doing together, only for you to decide to switch it off like that.
It is not that simple, and it does not work like that. It requires you to give yourself time, and in those times, when you are dedicated enough, provided you mean to really let go, you will be able to forget about him with little stress.
Welcome New Relationships
If you really want to move on and be free from any kind of confusion, you need to start making new connections.
And to do that, you do not just sit at home sulking about the fact that you have to endure leaving a married man alone.
Nowadays, there are numerous dating apps you can choose to use to seek connections. Even so, that is just one of the many ways to make new connections.
In any environment you find yourself in, there will definitely be a potential match for you. Someone would want to show what a relationship is like.
But if you are bent on not letting go, how then will you be able to experience this form of genuine love from someone else who does not belong to any woman?
So, another way to let go completely is to welcome new connections. If anyone shows interest in you, make sure not to make him suffer too much.
Rebuild Your Social Life
Take into consideration the time you must have spent with this man. Do you realize that if you had spent that time with your family and friends, by now, you would have actually gotten somewhere with them?
When it comes to family and friends, they can be said to be our main backbones, and so, when we disregard this fact and waste time with other people apart from them, consider what will happen if we find ourselves in some rabbit hole.
They are the very few people who will come to you, no matter what. And so, instead of wasting time thinking of what to do with your life in his absence, why not start spending time with your family? Why not create deep and lasting bonds with them?
Their presence alone will take up the time you could have used to think about him. And in only a matter of time, you will be back to yourself.
Therefore, it is in your best interest to start hanging out with your social circle. They might be the only real people you have.
Important Reasons Why You Should Let Go
Here are some reasons why you should really consider letting go:
- You get your peace of mind
Once you decide not to go out with a married man again, you can enjoy sound peace of mind. Why so? Because in the case where you were so attached to him, you must have been always thinking about him, what he was doing with his wife, if he was going to meet you, and a whole lot.
It can actually give you a headache. But when you are able to let go and be yourself, you get to finally free yourself from that state of constant confusion, or even wondering where you stand in his life.
- You become open to real relationships
When you are able to let go of him. You are finally able to see how many potential suitors are out there who are ready to take you out and show you how much they can give you whatever you need and the kind of love that you really deserve.
- You become free to explore
Like they say, life is short and can be challenging at times. But when you are able to let go of him, you finally begin to feel at ease and are able to explore freely without feeling emotionally attached to someone who might not even take you anywhere.
- You gain mental clarity
After being able to let go, you become free. After all the hurt and confusion, you finally become okay and can finally think and act appropriately because, mostly, when people make decisions, they do so with influence from their current situation, which somehow clouds their judgment, making them make wrong decisions. However, when you are able to let go, You get free of all of that.
- You are able to focus on your needs
One thing about letting go of a married man is that you finally get the time for yourself to focus on things that are important to you. Such as your career, your family and friends, your hobbies, and a whole lot more.
