You’ve been together for years and talk of honeymoons and babies seem to be all around you and this might mean that you are pushing for a proposal. But you might think that dropping hints is the best place to begin, however, it can be a very delicate topic. You’ve got to bear some of the following in mind:
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Understand Their Perspective
You might be lusting after the finest engagement rings on the market but have you thought about your partner’s feelings and reasons for not proposing at this point? We can easily become blindsided by the fact that we are on a timeline, but they may very well be too. If you rush them into doing something they’re not ready for, or they think that they need to take off a few things in terms of their life lists, such as a new career or a specific salary, the pressure can invariably stop them from proposing and cause problems between the two of you.
Be Aware of Your Goals
As a couple, your long-term goals should be the priority, not if he’s going to put a ring on your finger. While marriage for many people is something that they prefer to do before they have a baby, there could be several other things that your partner wants to achieve first. But if you are on two different pages, and they are trying to prioritize their career and you are already in a good career, there could be a major mismatch here. You need to discuss those long-term goals and aspirations so you can then understand if marriage is the next logical step.
Time It Right
Lots of people prefer to bring up topics of contention at bedtime. If you want to discuss the idea of getting married seriously, you will need to gauge the situation and choose the right time. There could be times when your partner feels pressured, or there could be moments of stress in both your lives. It’s something that you need to think about. Additionally, if you are thinking about dropping hints rather than talking about it in a very pressurized way, you are better off talking about it around those future plans or in subtle ways that give your partner enough time to formulate a truthful response.
Make It a Mutual Decision
Lots of couples talk about the idea of engagement, but if there is pressure on one person to propose, it can seem to come from the wrong place. People can propose purely to take the pressure off themselves, but this is not the right way of doing it. Both partners should be ready to take that big step, and therefore discussing it properly is so important.
Make the Most of Your Relationship
Engagements are one aspect of many in a relationship. It’s more important to remember that your relationship is a lifelong journey, and you have to approach this topic with sensitivity and respect. But you may be better off in the meantime celebrating who you are as a couple.